Preschool Is A Waste Of Time

Round 1
Phil: "Parents should not send their children to preschool for several reasons. First and foremost, the year is better spent with a full-time parent. In addition, most children will learn very little at preschool. Contrary to claims made by preschool advocates, children are not better equipped because of preschool. They may develop social skills and hand painting skills sooner, however children that miss preschool will quickly catch up before they finish the first grade."

Crystal: "I believe the intention of preschool is misunderstood and that the right school can be an excellent resource for a mother. A child needs to have a place to meet other children, learn to share both attention and their toys and have a place where they can be introduced to the idea of school and what it will be like including getting used to a schedule and being in an environment where an adult other than the parent is in charge. A positive experience at preschool can really help make a comfortable transition for a child by lessening the fears of the unknown."

Round 2
Phil: "All of the benefits you listed, such as a smoother transition for the child, learning to share, and a lessening of fear can be accomplished in the 1st grade. Preschool doesn't give children a significant advantage in their following year, nor in their later years.

I don't know where we get this mentality that we need to make transitions easier for children. Or, that we need to lessen the fear factor for children. Doing one or both of these things in fact hurts children by not preparing them. The world is in fact a scary place, and the fear of going to school for the first time is the last thing about which parents should be concerned. I also don't think parents should be so willing to part with their young child just so the mother can aquire resources and/or networking.

Crystal: "Yes, of course these things could be accomplished in 1st grade but most schools have an expectation that a child will come to first grade with these basic skills allowing them to focus on reading and other core fundamentals. If a child is not adjusted to spending time away from his mother or does not know how to play with other children, the child will fall behind not only in learning but will also not know how to establish friendships with other children. We all know that children can be tough on each other. It is important early on for a child to establish bonds with their classmates. No one wants to be the kid that is picked last to play ball. This can have a serious negative impact on the child that will live with him throughout his school years and the rest of his life.

Yes life is scary but it is our responsibility as parents to make the world less scary by helping our children cope with fears and letting them know that even if they are scared, they will be ok. Not every lesson has to be hard, especially at such a young age. For example throwing your child into the pool and saying sink or swim is not the best way to teach them to swim and when you are teaching them to ride a two wheel bicycle- you hold on to the back until they get the hang of it before you let them go solo. School is the same way. Furthermore, I believe most kids enjoy preschool. For those that don't- it may not be the right school for that child or the right time for that child to participate. As for your last remark- Being a good parent first requires knowing your child and what will work best for that kid. If your child is bored at home or needs a new adventure then a couple hours away from his mother at preschool may just be the answer. Second, you do not give up your child to gain resources or to network. You draw on appropriate resources such as doctors, friends and relatives, schools, other parents, etc to ensure your child gets the best possible care, nurturing, entertainment and education that they can get. No parent should be so arrogant to think that they can or should do it on their own. Being a parent is just like every other profession you learn not only by trial and error but by others who have experience and expertise and who can help you to tackle the most difficult yet amazing project in the world- raising a happy, healthy, and well adjusted child."

Round 3
Phil: "Hello Crystal,

I need to concede several points. First of all, I now believe that preschool (pre-K) can in fact be beneficial for some children (and parents). My real argument here was against the notion that our government should be funding preschool. That seems like an absurd idea to me. I do beleive that a big percentage of children may not be ready to go to preschool, and there's no benefit to force them to do so because the learning is so insignificant. Most importantly, parents shouldn't be pawning off their kids to preschools just because they (the parents) have lives too. When you choose to become a parent, then being a good parent becomes your job, your hobby, and your life. I'm not sure if you're going to agree or disagree with these points, so I may have to concede this debate because my blanket statement was so general. I still look forward to hearing your opinions on the matter."

Crystal: "Phil,

I do agree with your closing argument. First and foremost being a parent is a serious decision that is often taken to lightly. It is your job, your entertainment and your life from the day that the little one is conceived. A cherished gift that should never be pawned off on anyone. Second, I agree that the government should not be paying for preschool. I also believe that most preschools are set up primarily as a day care and that parents often use them as means to get a break from their children. This is NOT what preschool should be. I do know first hand that preschool can be a positive experience for a child. I had the privilege of going to a christian preschool where we were read Bible stories, went on nature walks and sang songs like Jesus loves me. The fact that I still have fond memories to this day about the time spent there says a lot, but I do agree that it may not be for every child. It is a decision that should not be assumed but one that should be discussed and decided with the individual child in mind."